- Warner Bros. Television
- Trust is an important part of a relationship.
- April Masini, a relationship columnist and expert, talks to INSIDER about the most common signs that your partner does not trust you.
- This can show itself in how they interact with their friends.
- If they look through your phone, this is another possible sign.
Some of the most common people give advice in order to maintain a healthy relationship is good communication, sexual chemistry, and, of course, trust. We all know how important trust is in relationships, but if something happened in the past where you were betrayed, it can be hard to let that go of those worries and fears.
How can you really decipher between your significant others with a small amount of jealousy and crossing the line? INSIDER spoke with relationship columnist and expert, April Masini, to find out the telltale signs that your partner does not trust you.
They snoop through your phone.
- The CW
If you walk into the room and see your partner swiping through your phone, that's a big red flag, according to Masini.
"If your partner does not trust you, the first place they are going to go is your cell phone to see who you are calling and texting, who's calling and texting you, and what you are texting other people," said Machines. "Cell phones have become ground zero for betrayal, so if you or your partner have trust issues, you will see signs of those problems when you or your partner snoop to check each other's phones."
They're asking you the same questions over and over again.
If things are getting a little repetitive and your partner is looking for reassurance for questions you've already answered, they might be testing to see if you switch your response.
"If your partner asks you something and then ask the next day, and the same question again, later, it's not because they forgot. It's because they do not trust your answer, "explained Masini. "When your partner is suspicious, they're going to ask over and over and over again."
They're checking your wallet for receipts.
- Shutterstock / Boryana Manzurova
If your significant other is flipping through your receipts, it's not just to see what you ordered for dinner.
"If your partner does not trust you, they will look for evidence of their worst suspicions," said Masini. "For example, they will look for credit card statements and receipts that might show hotel stays, restaurant visits, and gift charges – for people other than you. They may even be looking for secret credit card accounts that you may be keeping from them. "
The flame dies out in the bedroom.
- The CW
According to Masini, if your partner does not trust you, they probably will not feel like being intimate with you – "good sex requires trust."
Of course, there are a million reasons why things may not be going well in your sex life, which is where good communication comes in.
They become very accusatory.
If someone does not trust you, they might start accusing you of things that they fear will do to them, even if they do not have any evidence of you doing it.
"When your partner does not trust you, they will start accusing you of behavior you may not even be guilty of," explained Masini. "They're grasping at the straws to see if their worst fears are true, by accusing you of what they suspect you of. If these seemingly weird accusations start coming, understand that this is your partner trying to protect him or her by preempting any discovery of betrayal by pointing fingers and trying to force you to come out with a truth that will make them right. Stay clear, and stay honest. "
They're hanging out with people who encourage their fears.
According to Masini, if your partner starts suddenly hanging around with friends who have been betrayed, and they seem to be forming a club or support group, this can mean trouble. "Some partners are not directly when they feel they're not trusted. So, they act in a passion-aggressive way and find support for their fears, in friends who share the same fears in their own relationships. "
Though it may be important for your partner to have support from their friends, especially those who have gone through similar experiences they have, if their friends seem to be stoking their fears more than helping them, it may be worth a conversation.
Your partner starts to shut you out.
- The WB
Being vulnerable with someone and being able to share your deepest feelings with them is just one of the many amazing benefits of a healthy relationship. But someone who does not trust you may not feel comfortable doing so.
"If your partner does not want to share vulnerable parts of his or her life, it's because he or she does not feel safe with you," said Masini. "They've stopped trusting you and this closing rank around one's emotions is a way of self-protection from someone who is not trustworthy. Is this happening to you? "Asks Masini. "It's probably because your partner does not trust you."
Visit INSIDER's homepage for more.